The Tribune

By VERSHONNA PRATT


SEXUALLY active teenagers have different views on when is the right time to have sex, or ‘give it up,’ with their boyfriend or girlfriend.
Even though there is a lot of peer pressure for young people to have sex early in a relationship several young Bahamians said that it was beneficial to wait until a person had reached a level of maturity to engage in any sexual activity.
“While getting involved in a relationship you expect less from a guy. Time shows character, you learn the person, and the respect level you have for each other will increase,” Nadia Burrowns told Tribune Woman.
When two people have sex, an emotional connection takes place. For this reason one Bahamian women said it was best for teenagers to wait until they had matured to be sexually involved with someone.
“Younger girls can’t handle sex emotionally and the drama that comes along with it, worrying if the relationship is now a committed one because sex is involved,” she said.

“Worrying if he sees you differently, worrying about if he is with you for the relationship or just because you ‘gave it up’ also becomes part of it all. Sometimes you are pressured and feel obligated to ‘give it up,’” she said.
Maria told Tribune Woman a person should be mature and confident that they are ready for sex.

“It is important you know what you are doing because sex is a delicate and emotionally attached thing that should be a mutual agreement. You should have the confidence that the person cares about you. It shows emotionally and physically,” she said.
When it comes to ‘giving it up,’ or having sex, there is no such thing as too early, said Ashley.
“Each case is different. If he is undressing me on our way out the door to go out on our first date, well maybe that’s a bit too soon, but again I say, there is no such thing as too soon.”
Ayllson told Tribune Woman that after meeting her boyfriend she only waited one month before having sex. However, she said before having sex with him she was well aware of his health status.
“My boyfriend and I had sex after only dating a little over a month. I don’t regret it and neither does he. We have been together almost two years and still going strong and we love each other very much.”

“We were together long enough to talk about STDs and the other things I believe you should know about your boyfriend/girlfriend. I would never sleep with someone I just met in a bar, just because I have no clue what they are carrying.

“I never looked for a ‘hook up’ or ‘friend-with-benefit’ situation, I’ve always been a long term relationship type of person. I love my soon-to-be fianc� with all my heart and I don’t regret how we progressed in our relationship,” she said.
Several teenagers agreed that it was all about being comfortable with your partner or your love interest.
One 16-year-old said: “I feel once you click well with a person, it can be three days or five years. If you feel comfortable with that person, the length of time to wait to ‘give it up,’ doesn’t really matter.

Fabiola Turner, who is older, disagrees. She said: “Having sex before 18 is too soon. I don’t think teenagers’ bodies are at a fully developed stage.

“Despite having strong sexual urges during my teenage years I avoided fulfilling these urges because often teenagers have sex for the wrong reasons, with a number of people, and also unprotected.”

Nineteen-year-old Mia said she battled self-esteem issues when she was younger, which caused her to turn to sex for reassurance and comfort early in her teenage years.

“The reason why some teenagers having sex so soon maybe because of a low self-esteem like I battled with in my early teenage years,” she said.
She added: “I am not going to lie. I had sex with most guys way too soon but I had a low self-esteem. I thought having sex would make them want me more. I was young and stupid. Now that I am older, I usually wait until the fifth date to have sex.”