The Tribune

By KIRKLAND PRATT

In Bahamian social circles, people often speak to what runs them ‘’hot’’, referring to those pesky things that trigger our anger and set the best of us beside ourselves. Often time, clear eventualities that lend to a loss of emotional control are relished and shared with vigour and conviction. Perhaps self-defeating behaviour but certainly mainstream in its appeal across our islands.

Emotional intelligence is the capacity to recognize and effectively manage emotions in ourselves and with others. Emotional intelligence increases our ability to make good decisions, build relationships, deal with stress, and cope with change.

Prior to the 1990s very little was discussed about emotional intelligence. Eventually, the notion of this new school of thought, its measurement and its significance to our lives, gained traction in the media and spawned on-going research and application.

Of significant qualitative value is the finding of a pioneering study that people who had average intelligence outperformed those who had the highest levels of intelligence, 70 percent to be exact. Very quickly this new social phenomenon established itself as a key determinant of one’s potential for a rewarding and enriched existence.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is paramount to managing one’s actions and inactions. It predicates response timing, force, convictions through social situations, and making critical choices in life. The four groupings of the four widely discussed and established emotional intelligence competencies are:

Self-Awareness, which speaks to how accurately an individual can recognize an emotion in the actual moment and attach consistency tendencies across time and situation.

Self-Management, which describes how an individual utilizes an intrinsic awareness of his/her emotions so as to exhibit the desired behaviour.

Social Awareness, which is largely connected to worldview and the ability to distinguish and read the emotions of other people.

Relationship Management, which results in a culmination of the three previously mentioned emotional intelligence skills so as to manage the display of emotions with other people.

We are emotional beings by nature and chemistry. The emotional brain reacts to events first before we have the chance to employ the rational brain. This is why so many people swear by the counting to 10 method to manage themselves in stressful situations. Counting to ten before reacting allows the rational brain to perform its function.

We have all said it to ourselves, if only I had given it some thought I would have responded more intelligently. Emotional intelligence requires effective communication between the rational and emotional centres of the brain. It is with balanced thought that we enact balanced responses.

Emotional Intelligence (EQ), Intelligence (IQ), and Personality do not go together in any meaningful way. It is very important not to confuse Emotional Quotient (EQ) with Intelligence Quotient (IQ). It is not possible to determine someone’s IQ based on their EQ and vice versa. Intelligence is how quickly you absorb new information and it does not change throughout your life. Emotional intelligence is unique in that with practice it can change.

Just like one’s Intelligence Quotient, personality does not change. Personality is the fashion with which a person projects to the world. I call it a world behavioural response. One example of this is the tendency we all have to be introverted or extroverted.

Emotional intelligence is fascinating as it requires us to ask ourselves the hard questions to improve on the quality of our lives. Much self-talk as well as social observations require us to enact empowering thought patterns towards self-actualization. Next week’s article will focus on emotional intelligence within the professional environment. Are you ‘’smart’’ at relationships? Perhaps.

Until then – keep thinking though; you are good for it.

• Kirkland H. Pratt, MSCP, is a Counselling Psychologist with a Master’s degree in Counselling Psychology with an emphasis in Education. He lectures in Industrial Psychology and offers counselling and related services to individuals and businesses. For comments, contact kirklandpratt@gmail.com.