The Tribune

By MICHELLE M MILLER

Have you ever achieved something only to realise that it was not as important as you thought it was? Or reached the top of the ladder of success only to recognise it was leaning against the wrong building? Do you ever feel trapped by life goals that really don’t belong to you? Instead, those goals belong to someone or some group hell bent on making your life their own.

You are not alone. There are thousands, if not millions of people across the globe questioning their life, their goals and whether they are climbing a ladder of success that gives them meaning and significance.

Living a copycat life is like that ole ‘monkey see monkey do’ mentally. If you don’t get to the bottom of it, it becomes a habit of empty pursuits. It builds frustration, dysfunction and eventually produces a life of sleep-walking through the motion. The question is – are you willing to change this aimlessness and replace it with meaningful goals? If you are willing, you surely can. The fact is only you are in control of your life. Whether you are actively using your authority to confidently drive your life in your desired direction of your life, is another story.

I believe that a key factor to the habit of drifting aimlessly is the way many define success. Success is more than money and mountains of material things. Rather, it is the daily pursuit of some worthy ideal. Life is not solely about what you can get, but more so who you can become and what you can give to the world. Amassing a great standard of living doesn’t guarantee you will experience a great quality of life.

There is a big difference between a good standard of living and a good quality of life.

Introspection is not an easy feat. That is why most do not do it. Yet, as Socrates reminds us, “An unexamined life is not worth living”. Find the courage to examine yourself, to know who you are and why your life is moving as such. When you focus on why you are moving rather than just where you are moving you will build a richer, quality life of meaning and purpose. This is an essential point to clarify. Unless you know why you cannot determine what matters and you cannot create any improvement.

Courage is an essential element of any worthy pursuit. In the words of American Existential Psychologist, Rollo May, “the opposite of courage is not cowardice, it is conformity; everybody trying to be like everybody else”.

Make no mistake about it; you are a storehouse of massive power. You can make the choice at any point to set meaningful goals. Your best source of strength is to recognize that you are not like anyone else. Within you, there is a unique melody. To live a life of meaning, muster the courage to dance to your own music.

Thomas Herold said: “Most people are working in places they don’t like – to buy stuff they don’t need.” It is a true statement indeed. Chasing after things, that you don’t need, that don’t really matter or just worrying about what people may say is a labour in futility. You cannot please everybody at the same time. While setting meaningful goals may not be a simple process, it is indeed doable. By focusing on the meaning, what matters most begins to change.

For example, rather than worry about the size of your house, focus more on ways in which you can make your house a home. Rather that fretting over the price of those expensive shoes, give your attention to the direction you are walking in. What is the point of expensive shoes on feet that are moving aimlessly?

Wherever you are now recognise that you have the power to change; to change yourself and to change your life. You are not born to just drift along the seas of life. Instead, you are born to make waves. When you embrace meaningful pursuits, you gain more clarity about how precious life is and you learn to give your attention to the things that really matter.

As you begin to redefine who you are and reshape your life goals, remember the value of service to others. Service is the key to wealth and happiness; it is truly a worthy ideal.

Make today the day that you take the lead in setting meaningful goals. In so doing, you give yourself permission to live a life of power and purpose. Now is the perfect time shift your life paradigm.

What do you think? Please send your comments to coaching242@yahoo.com or 429-6770. Michelle M. Miller is a certified Life-Coach, Leadership Expert and Author of Take The Lead. She is the CEO of TTL Coaching Strategies and founder of the Girls Leadership Coaching Club.