The Tribune

By MICHELLE MILLER

There is a huge difference between knowing your roots and being rooted in what you know, especially, about who you are.

Alas, in a culture of materialism and instant gratification, people choose the path of least resistance. Hence, the laborious process of establishing roots before branches is one that most ignore. Yet, more than anything else, the journey to the unveiling of yourself is worth the work.

In many respects, this habit of wanting the product but avoiding or disregarding the process has become the norm. Look at leadership, everybody wants to ‘lead’ others but refuse to lead himself or herself. Exceptional leadership is learning to lead yourself, to know who you are and what you stand on.

When you take this organic approach, you live a more authentic life. You validate what you stand on, before determining what you are stand for. Reconciling your past emotional accounts and standing on your own foundation of self-knowledge, prepares you to lead the future. This is about living from the inside out, rather than the outside in.

What do you know about who you are? What are the roots of your identity? Find the audacity to go beyond the surface of your surname, place of birth etc.

Indeed, the thought-provoking lyrics of the song ‘Roots before Branches’, is a clarion call for you let go of the so-called ‘easy way out’ and get into the real game of life. Awakening to the need to get inside and own your life. No longer trading now for later because you know now holds the power.

This is a sobering perspective that many may choose to ignore. Even so, the root of your identity doesn’t begin with your surname, ethnicity, or life circumstances. Your true self goes beyond the wall of small ideals. Your life is not some coincidence or stroke of luck, but a deliberate creation with an indelible purpose and you must know your roots before you can build branches.

Every tree stands sturdy and strong not because of its branches but because it is rooted in soil of life itself. While your surname, ethnicity etc. may offer clarity about your lineage, the umbilical cord of your real identity stretches beyond the abyss of the deepest ocean. This is a fundamental point, particularly for those who may have been abandoned or do not know their biological lineages.

Be encouraged. You are not without an identity. You are a key part of the masterpiece – you existed long before you came to be. So - what does this mean? It means that untangling the threads of your roots and identity is not a superficial undertaking. Take a deep dive onto the ocean floor.

As you expand your understanding, tribal identity alone will no longer be enough. This may be a colossal thought to embrace. However, what is most important is that you be willing to submerge into a deeper self-awareness.

Despite the habit of seeking material gain, life is not about the myriad of things you can get or even about who you can become. It is much more about unleashing who you already are. Sincere success takes effort. Similarly, solidifying your sense of self takes work.

Accepting yourself with all of your so-called flaws can be uncomfortable. This is the core reason why many opt to look for branches before forming any roots. The lamentation that it is too difficult or takes too long lead many to live life out on a limb without self-confidence.

Bigger still, building roots before branches is an affront to the common herd mentality. You must be willing break out of this box. The only way to break out is with a breakthrough of new, quality information that opens your mind. People behave according to the information circulating their minds.

No doubt, information has enormous power. Overtime, the information you absorb becomes the root of how you think, whether as a sheep or the shepherd of your own life. Consider the behaviour of people you see - are they acting like the sheep or the shepherd?

I grew up in an orderly, respectful Bahamian Society with the proverb that ‘money may take you around the world, but manners and respect will take you through the world.’ This truth became a core part of my identity even to this day. What I know for sure is that our daily words set our social norms. Words have power. They become the root of our understanding, about not only who we are but also about what is possible for our lives.

Just as a ship drifts aimlessly without an anchor, your life becomes meaningless without being rooted in a deep understanding of your identity.

Wanting the product without engaging in the process or growing branches before roots is also part of social conditioning.

We teach children to look outward to see who they want to be but seldom encouraged them to look inward to know who they are. Consequently, the feeling of not being good enough becomes a major, emotionally painful challenge. Many eventually mask this inner pain through alcohol, drugs, or other ‘numbing’ agents.

The fact of the matter is a disconnected self-identity and unregulated self-expression has far-reaching social implications. People must find the courage to know who they are.

If you find yourself struggling with this dilemma, do not lose hope. Begin to build faith in yourself. Despite your challenges, your life has immense value and a specific purpose that only you can fill.

Take the time to reexamine who you are in order to reorient your life. I know it is easier, said than done but it is doable. Your life improves only when your mind improves.

The bottom line is you cannot build anything (be it your life, your career, marriage, business or this nation) without first building yourself. To do so is like trying to grow branches without having any roots.

As you make today the day that you take the lead, sincerely consider the degree to which you are growing roots before branches. Make the commitment to know who you are before worrying about who you want to be.

Now is the perfect time to shift your life paradigm.

• Michelle M. Miller is a certified Life-Coach, Leadership Expert and Host of the Radio program – Men & The e-Factor. Questions or comments can be sent to email coaching242@yahoo.com or telephone 429-6770 or visit www.taketheleadbook.com.