The Tribune

By JEFFARAH GIBSON

Tribune Features Writer

jgibson@tribunemedia.net

MANY single women experience pressure to find the right mate, settle down, get married and have a family. However, in their quest to find love and meet that certain someone before their biological clock runs out they often neglect to celebrate the journey of singleness.

With a new book, first-time author Dr Tamalia Hanchell seeks to debunk misconceptions about singlehood and give women practical advice to enjoy the journey.

“Serena’s Secrets: Confessions of a Single Lady”, Dr Hanchell said, takes a holistic approach to being single and addresses various topics including how to cope with the pressure to get married, healing from a broken heart, choosing the right mate, how to become a good mate, the benefits of being single, single parenting, developing healthy friendships and much more.  

“I believe that God placed the passion and desire in me to write this book. He is definitely my biggest inspiration,” she told Tribune Woman. 

“Also, as a 30-year-old single woman I was inspired to write this book because of my own journey. I know what it feels like to get the question, ‘Why are you not married yet?’, and I have personally experienced some of the stigmas and stereotypes that go along with one’s relationship status. Being a single woman can be difficult in a society where singleness is often deemed as a flaw. I wrote ‘Serena’s Secrets: Confessions of a Single Lady’ to encourage other single women to celebrate this season of being single and in the book I share my own triumphs and how I overcame my tragedies on this journey. I want women to know that they are valuable, beautiful and to remember that no matter who has rejected or hurt them, they are loved unconditionally by God.”

Dr Hanchell said in writing the book she wanted to encourage women to be healed from past situations that may have damaged them greatly.

“Put simply, I want to build others up and help them conquer the inevitable challenges of life using godly and psychological principles. Many times we carry emotional baggage that hinder our relationships with others. As a clinical psychologist, emotional healing is something that I deem as very important. I address this throughout the book and give specific steps on how to heal from a broken heart. I am grateful that although only recently released, persons have been expressing how the book has helped them to heal,” she said.

“I literally poured out my heart in the pages of the book and shared my own personal experiences in a very conversational manner. Although I wrote the book with single women in mind, married women and men are also reading ‘Serena’s Secrets: Confessions of a Single Lady’ and finding it enlightening. It is particularly helpful for men to be able to understand how women think. Anyone can benefit from reading this book, even if they are not single.”

In addition to putting her heart and soul into this book, Dr Hanchell said she also had to be open about her private life and feelings, which was something new for her given that she is usually a quiet and shy person. She said she had to take the leap and move out of her comfort zone. 

“I hope that single women would celebrate their singleness rather than rushing to get married out of impatience or desperation. Being single is a season to be celebrated. I devoted an entire chapter to exploring some of the many benefits of being single. Don’t get me wrong, marriage is beautiful when done correctly. However, like I say in my book, ‘a good thing at the wrong time is a bad thing for you.’ I also want readers to realise their worth and never settle for less than they deserve. Additionally, I hope that male readers and married people would gain a better understanding of what single women experience,” she said. 

As the daughter of Bishop Walter Hanchell and Elder Minalee Hanchell, Dr Hanchell said she was given godly principles to live by from birth.

She received her high school education at St Augustine’s College then matriculated at Messiah College where she obtained her bachelor’s degree in psychology. She earned her master’s and doctorate degrees in clinical psychology from Argosy University Tampa and she is a licenced psychologist in the state of Florida.

Dr Hanchell is the recipient of various accolades including the National Scholarship Award, the Outstanding Senior Psychology Student award and being listed in the ‘Who’s Who Among College Students’ in America.

Some of her civic involvement has included volunteering at Great Commission Ministries International, Operation Explosion, the Special Olympics and Road to Recovery. She was also a committee member of the Miss Gospel Bahamas pageant.

Dr Hanchell enjoys travelling, listening to music, and strongly believes laughter is the best medicine for the soul.

“Serena’s Secrets”, which features a foreword from the late Dr Myles Munroe, is on sale on sites such as amazon.com and has already received positive reviews from people all over the world.

In Nassau, the book is available at Great Commission Ministries on Wulff Road, Party Mart near Bar 20 Corner, Quality Fabrics on Mount Royal Avenue and PGF Realty on Mount Royal Avenue.

For more information visit www.tamaliahanchell.com.