The Tribune

By BIANCA CARTER

It’s hard to keep things going in a world that moves at the speed of light. Being a working mom, a single mom, any mom, is challenging.

Not only is it a difficult task a lot of the time, but we tend to beat ourselves up over things that we don’t do perfectly. For many women, having enough time for your kids is very important and one of those things we tend to lament over.

If you have more than one child it becomes even harder to make sure that you are giving them all of the attention and time they need.

Here are five things you can do to make each of your children feel special:

• Ask them how their day was. Just like adults, kids like to share their stories and experiences with people they love. If you can’t be with your children all the time, this is a very important way to keep tabs on them. Apart from making your child feel like you care, it also establishes honest and open communication early on.

• Get on their level. If you have toddlers or younger kids, try speaking to them at their level. Get on your knees or sit on the floor next to them to talk to them. Connecting with them on their level, in their space, makes them feel important, comforted and supported. No one likes being talked down to, right? Be prepared for lots of hugs, kisses and giggles when you do this.

• Look them in the eye. You may feel that you do this already, but if you pay attention and are conscious of this point, I think you may be surprised at the lack of eye contact. I know it’s not intentional; we just get so used to doing and thinking of a million things all at once. Looking at your children when you’re speaking with them will make them feel important and special.

• Read to them. Reading to your child is very important. Teachers like to impress upon us the importance of reading to our kids so that they can establish a life-long love of learning, but reading also creates a forum for dialogue and open communication.

• Have moments where you put it all away. We pride ourselves in being the best multitaskers in the world. After all, we are superheroes in our own right, taking care of everything around us. We’re used to doing it all and everyone knows when you need some help, all you do is yell, “Mom!”

Yes, we’re super important in the lives of our family, but there comes a time when “doing it all” gets in the way of making our loved ones, our children, in particular, feel special and important. It feels like we’re brushing them off or not paying enough attention. Make a point, every day, to put away all of the things we manage, out of our hands and out of our minds so that we can be present in what’s happening right now, in that particular moment, instead of planning what’s for dinner tomorrow night. Giving your child your undivided, 100 per cent attention will definitely make them feel loved, important and super special.

Love and hugs!

• Bianca Carter is a certified lactation counsellor, founder of Bun in the Oven, and weekend radio personality on Y98 radio. For more information, e-mail her at info@babybunintheoven.com, or bcarter@tribunemedia.net. Follow BITO on Facebook at babybunintheoven, and check out the BITO Blog every Monday and Thursday at http://babybunintheoven.com.