Wild Card Awards
- The “Epic Fail That Makes Me Question Everything About Your Life Choices” Award presented by Mike Tyson riding the hoverboard during the Christmas holidays - Blair Walsh. It was an extra point man…an extra point.
- The “Some Men Just Want To See The World Burn” Award presented by Heath Ledger’s Joker - Joey Porter. Quick, name the last time you saw a linebackers coach go on the field to check on an injured wide receiver.
- The “Just When I Thought I Was Out They Pull Me Back In” Award presented by Bill Clinton anytime he watches Fox News - Aaron Rodgers. Erased all memory of a sub par season with when he completed 14 of 20 passes for 148 yards with two touchdown passes in the second quarter against Washington.
Chiefs at Patriots
SANNIE: I have to keep riding with Tom Brady, he brought me luck this far, so why would I stop now?
PATS over Chiefs
RENALDO: You would think that after watching his brother’s UFC career get sidetracked by a drug habit, and hearing the stories of what seems like 55 college athletes lose their minds to synthetic marijuana use - Patriots defensive end Chandler Jones would stay away from the stuff. Nope! High beyond belief, Jones wandered into a police station and was hospitalised overnight. Here’s the kicker - he returned to the practice field the next day. I’m worried about Alex Smith if he has someone with that level of determination coming at him every play. The Pats have the real Brady and Gronk while the Chiefs have Smith and Kelce, the homeless man’s version of Brady and Gronk.
PATS over Chiefs
Packers at Cardinals
RENALDO: That second quarter against the Racial Slurs last week - that’s why I’m always terrified to bet against Aaron Rodgers. He completed 14 of 20 passes for 148 yards with two touchdown passes. That’s an excellent game for Ryan Tannehill and it was 15 minutes of work for Rodgers. In all likelihood this does irreparable damage to the relationship between me and Olivia Munn…but I can’t take Rodgers this week. It’s tempting because the entire Packers defence has this “us against the Al Jazeera report” chip on their shoulder, but the Cardinals have been arguably the most complete team in the NFL all year. Also, Carson Palmer does the Degeneration-X celebration, so there’s that.
CARDS over Packers
SANNIE: I have no idea what to do here, seriously. Um, Cardinals because I bought a tin of Cardinal cream on Sunday. (I’m trying here, excuse me).
CARDINALS over
Packers
Seahawks at Panthers
SANNIE: I knew this day would come, Russell Wilson vs Cam Newton. I have to make a choice. I’m sorry Russell.
PANTHERS over
Seahawks
RENALDO: I feel like we both should just revisit exactly what we said in the week six matchup because it still holds true “SANNIE: The day has finally come, I have to choose between Russell Wilson and Cam Newton. Sigh, Russell is new to my heart but Cam will forever have it (after my fiancé of course).” ‘
My take on Infidelity Bowl 2016 varies a bit from the October meeting. The Panthers started to believe they were good when they upset the Seahawks in that game. Now they know it, and they play like it.
PANTHERS over
Seahawks
Steelers at Broncos
RENALDO: Karma is definitely not in the Steelers’ favour. Big Ben couldn’t throw the ball more than five yards on their game winning drive so he basically became Ryan Tannehill. Their coaching staff started flexing their muscles like Dan Campbell and the running game at this point is reduced to a Lamar Miller-like level of efficiency. They’re basically the Dolphins right now. On top of that the concussion status of Antonio Brown is still up in the air. I’m completely basing this pick on sentiment and a feather in the cap for (alleged) safely regulated PED users everywhere. There’s no better story in sports if Peyton Manning comes back and wins this Super Bowl.
BRONCOS at Steelers
SANNIE: I guess I will go with the Broncos because I recognise Peyton Manning.
BRONCOS over
Steelers
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