The Tribune

By Inigo Naughty Zenicazelaya

THE word of the week, my friend, appears to be ‘payback’: Prime Minister Christie lamented on it, Bran McCartney endorsed it and ‘Butler and Sands’ prepared for it.

Tit for tat

It was interesting listening to Prime Minister Christie in the House this week discuss the highly contagious “payback syndrome” that apparently swept through the country leading up to the country’s last failed referendum.

According to the PM, the temptation to go against the Progressive Liberal Party (PLP) was so great that the masses collectively voted against the gender equality bills to spite the government. And, as far as Mr Christie is concerned, now “we must move on”.

While it was good to see the PM actually acknowledge the fact that the majority of Bahamians ‘ain’t on the PLP run’ right now, I still sensed a bit of delusion with the whole ‘moving on’ part. Truth be told, the PLP’s brand is so damaged right now Mr Christie couldn’t sell freedom in Fox Hill Prison. Very few people trust the party or its leader for many and varying reasons.

For the electorate, there is no ‘moving on’.

Right after the failed referendum, Mr Christie should have resigned. Or at least make it plain he would not be seeking re-election next year. He did neither. So the junkanoo beat goes on. But come 2017, the PM will realise that the 2016 referendum was in fact not payback but merely an appetiser. Believe me, Bahamians are still hungry. The next general election is the cold main course and no amount of free BPL electricity will heat it up.

Speaking of the referendum, why are the Prime Minister and the PLP government still harping on about Opposition Leader Dr Minnis’ about face on the matter? Nice try trying to pin the failed vote on Minnis’ slick ‘vote your conscience’ line but at this point nobody cares any more. Yes, we see what he did. No, we don’t know why you were shocked, Mr Christie. ‘Vote your conscience’ is the political get-out-of-jail-free card. As we speak, US House Speaker Paul Ryan is playing the same card to free his members from endorsing or voting for his party’s presumptive presidential nominee Donald Trump.

Let that sink in.

By comparison, what Minnis did was a joke. And politicians the world over have long used the ‘conscience’ card to wiggle out of tricky positions. Dr Minnis played that card, and he played the PLP. Back in 2002, the Christie-led PLP opposition also pulled a bait and switch on the then Free National Movement (FNM) government. So, as the kids say on Twitter: #ChristieTaughtHim.

Our dear Prime Minister Christie (who loves referring to himself in the third person) also said that Prime Minister Christie was shocked by the “utterances of a hidden agenda”.

Really? Why?

It’s been known for years that the controversial bill No.4 would present problems for the referendum. Why didn’t the government safeguard the referendum by properly addressing that issue?

Mr Christie’s talk of syndromes brings another famous American one to mind: NIMBY. It’s an acronym for Not In My Back Yard, an ironclad position held by many Americans concerning certain unwanted developments like prisons or power plants in their neighbourhood. Well, in the Bahamas anything real or perceived having to do with the LGBT or ‘gay community’ is this country’s NIMBY. (Please pardon the pun).

From what I can see, the government failed women when they failed to tackle the issue head on. And sadly, regardless of how many times Dr Minnis ostensibly flipped or flopped, the results would have been the same.

Eye for an eye

Also making news this week, Democratic National Alliance leader Branville McCartney had his own brand of payback in mind when he spoke out about the country’s crime problem that our blind Minister of National Security keeps trying to talk up.

While no one - and I mean no one from here to eternity - has faith that Minister Dr Bernard Nottage has a clue on what is happening and even less of one on how to stop it from happening, I don’t understand why Mr McCartney still speaks so superficially so publicly about capital punishment.

Because he is a learned attorney, I have no doubt that Mr McCartney has the legal prowess to take the imposition of the death penalty out of the hands of the Privy Council. Because he has experienced firsthand the cruel and unforgivable crime of having a loved one murdered, I have no doubt that he has the resolve to see justice for all murder victims.

It’s when Mr McCartney and also Dr Minnis start sounding like gangster rappers I get concerned.

Both spoke of capital punishment and the death penalty this week and used terms like ‘pop their necks’ (Minnis) and ‘they getting fat in prison’ (McCartney). And while I agree with Dr Minnis that the criminals committing the crimes are ‘murderous scumbags’, I prefer a bit more solemnity when addressing a grave national issue such as capital punishment.

We all know that there will be no young black men hanging from nooses in Rawson Square. We all know there will be no flogging (as McCartney previously suggested) in Rawson Square.

Hanging, especially in broad daylight downtown where all the ‘good tourists’ (and their ‘innocent little tourist babies’) can see our failures, is a non-starter. So how can we take politicians seriously who still try to sell us that hanging will ever be a reality in this country again?

We shouldn’t take them seriously.

Trust me, I’m not down with the bleeding hearts. I personally believe in capital punishment, once justice has run its fair and proper course and all appeals have been heard.

In order for it to make sense in this country we have to address judicial reform, the appeals process and the manner by which we would carry out such sentences. Hanging is untenable. Lethal injection is palatable.

So instead of sounding ‘cool’ on capital punishment, I wish both Dr Minnis and Mr McCartney would give us detailed plans on how we move from a 19th century mentality on crime to 21st century actionability on crime.

Capital punishment is an option that should not be unilaterally taken off the table by the Privy Council. Leaders should speak to that and save the ‘popping collars’ and ‘popping necks’ talk to Snoop Dogg.

Reprisals

This past week FNM senator Dr Duane Sands announced that he will seek the deputy leader post when the party goes to convention in July. He also informed us that Loretta Butler-Turner will once again seek the leadership position of the party. The duo will go head-to-head with current leader Dr Hubert Minnis and deputy leader K Peter Turnquest. In other words, round two.

I’m still mulling over each group’s chances at winning and will speak on it more in the coming weeks. But just like Facebook I am having a chuckle that the ‘Butler and Sands’ hash tag that has been floating around social media for a few weeks before the announcement has indeed come to life.

• Inigo ‘Naughty’ Zenicazelaya is the resident stand-up comic at Jokers Wild Comedy Club at the Atlantis, Paradise Island, resort and presents ‘Mischief and Mayhem in da AM’ from 6am to 10am, Monday to Friday, and ‘The Press Box’ sports talk show on Sunday from 10am to 1pm on KISS FM 96.1. He also writes a sports column in The Tribune on Tuesday. Comments and questions to naughty@tribunemedia.net