The Tribune

By MICHELLE MILLER

We have all heard the saying that you are what you eat. While having a balanced diet is essential, the deeper struggle for most people goes beyond mere food consumption. It’s about getting to the root of what’s eating you that matters most. Your life is a reflection of both what you eat – and what’s eating you. We have a tendency to focus only on the food we take in not the thoughts and emotions that reside deep within.

This is true especially for women who, for the most part, are conditioned to believe that identity is the result of how they look. This shallow focus on their hair, skin and body type gives many a false sense of identity. Both the so-called big girl and skinny girl are challenged with this identity crisis. So much so that it soon mushrooms into this habit of masking; hiding behind popular fashion trends but never dealing with what’s eating them.

Being more concerned about outer appearance, women invest a major part of their financial resources into what they ‘eat’. As I said, food intake alone is not the sole definition of what you eat. This intake includes the excessive amount of time and money you spend on hair and makeup, alcohol and gambling, as well as the often wasted hours plugged into social media and television watching. All of these combined have a direct influence your beliefs and behaviour.

Not paying attention to those unresolved, underlying issues eating away at your emotions is what sustains any over-indulgence into food, alcohol et cetera. The difficulty here is masking is a habit. The more you mask, the more masking you have to do just to keep up with your lies. It was Henry Thoreau who said, “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

The point here is, while you are what you eat, you are also what you think, believe, fear and feel.

Each of which strongly influence your sense of identity.

A shallow identity leads to living a shallow life. Spending your whole life masking who you really is not a resourceful choice. Taking time to dig up those hidden emotions of the past allows you to face your fears and step into a higher purpose.

I believe that when you tell yourself the truth about what’s true for you, it’s a gift you give to yourself. Too many of us spend our whole life living according to someone else’s truth.

One of my life principles is that you cannot fix what you are unwilling to face. Try as you may, you cannot run away from yourself. Wherever you go, there you are.

Find your fearless power. Divorce yourself from the idea that you need to mask your way through your life. In so doing, you give yourself the conscious freedom to be yourself.

Rather than being a puppet on a string, you instead become you own puppet master.

Leader to leader, remember nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, can free you from yourself. Taking off the mask and really examining what’s eating you isn’t some walk in the park. It’s a complex and often uncomfortable process. But if it enables you to gain the power of your own inner liberation, it is worth the work. Nothing could be more powerful than claiming yourself and owning your life.

Take the time to reassess your sense of identity. Clear out those many masks and really get the help you need redefine your life.

By digging a little deeper you move confidently towards living an empowered life. Yes, you definitely can do it.

What do you think? Please send your comments to coaching242@yahoo.com or 429-6770.

• Michelle M Miller is a certified life coach, communication and leadership expert. Visit www.talktomichellemiller.com or call 1-888-620-7894; mail can be sent to PO Box CB-13060.