The Tribune

By Sergeant Nathalie Rangers

IT’S hard for some men to say “I need help”. While the majority of domestic violence victims are women, abuse of men happens far more often than you might expect. Typically, men are physically stronger than women but that doesn’t necessarily make it easier for him to escape the abuse or the relationship. Whatever your circumstances, you can overcome these challenges and escape the violence and abuse.

If you’re a man in an abusive relationship, it’s important to know that you’re not alone. It happens to men from many cultures and all walks of life regardless of age and occupation. Research suggests that as many as one in three victims of domestic violence are males. However, for many reasons men are often reluctant to report abuse by women because they feel embarrassed, or they fear they won’t be taken seriously. An abusive wife or partner may hit, kick, bite, punch, spit, throw things, or destroy your possessions. To make up for any difference in strength, she may attack you while you’re asleep or otherwise catch you by surprise. She may also use a weapon or strike you with an object, abuse or threaten your children.

Of course, domestic abuse is not limited to violence. Emotional and verbal abuse can be just as impactful. As a male, your spouse or partner may:

• Verbally abuse you, belittle you, or humiliate you in front of friends, colleagues, or family, or on social media.

• Be possessive, act jealous, or harass you with accusations of being unfaithful.

• Take away your car keys or medications to try to control where you go and who you see.

• Try to control how you spend money or deliberately default on joint financial obligations.

• Make false allegations about you to your friends, employer, or the police, or find other ways to manipulate and isolate you.

• Threaten to leave you and prevent you from seeing your kids, if you report the abuse.

Why do men stay in abusive relationships?

• Feeling ashamed

• Religious beliefs dictate that they do

• Lack of resources, cash and other tangible items, etc.

• They are in denial

How can a man get out of an abusive relationship?

Abuse need to be addressed swiftly and safely. If you’re in an abusive relationship, you need to take immediate action to preserve your own well-being and find the road to your recovery. Plan to definitely end your abusive relationship, keep yourself safe, and move on.

• Get help

• Recognise abuse

• Do not excuse or dismiss abusive behaviour

• Document the abuse

• Remember that abuse is not your fault

• Keep a list of safe people with their contact information

• Have an emergency plan

If you are being abused or suspect someone you know is experiencing abuse, Call 911 or 919 immediately or Call the Crisis Centre at 328-0922.

Let us create safer communities

• Please visit the Royal Bahamas Police Force website at www.royalbahamaspolice.org or Facebook page at www.facebook.com/rbpforce for Latest News, Daily Crime Reports and additional Crime Prevention Tips.