The Tribune

By Canon S Sebastian Campbell

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people

Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they'll make room for you. You shouldn't have to fight for a spot. Never, ever throw yourself at someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it's not the people that stand by your side when you're at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you're at your worst who are your true friends.

2. Stop running from your problems

Face them head on. No, it won't be easy. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren't supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That's not how we're made. In fact, we're made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because that's the whole purpose of living - to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately moulds us into the person we are to become.

3. Stop lying to yourself

You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can't lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves. Read "The Road Less Travelled" Dr M Scott Peck.

4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner

The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help others, but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.

5. Stop trying to be someone you're not

One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that's trying to make you like everyone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don't change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.

6. Stop trying to hold onto the past

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.

7. Stop being scared to make a mistake

Doing something and getting it wrong is at least 10 times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did not do far more than the things you did.

8. Stop trying to buy happiness

Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free - love, laughter and working on our passions.

9. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness

If you're not happy with who you are on the inside, you won't be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else. Read "Stumbling on Happiness" by Daniel Gilbert.

10. Stop being idle

Don't think too much or you'll create a problem that wasn't even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront. Making progress involves risk. You can't make it to second base with your foot on first.

11. Stop thinking you're not ready

Nobody ever feels 100 per cent ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won't feel totally comfortable at first.

12. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons

Relationships must be chosen wisely. It's better to be alone than to be in bad company. There's no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen - in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you're ready, not when you're lonely.

13. Stop trying to compete against everyone else

Don't worry about what others are doing better than you. Concentrate on beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between you and yourself only.

14. Stop being jealous of others

Jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: "What's something I have that everyone wants?"

15. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself

Life's curveballs are thrown for a reason - to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You'll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind or situation.

16. Stop holding grudges

Don't live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, "What you did to me is OK." It is saying, "I'm not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever." Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself. And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it's for you too.

17. Stop letting others bring you down to their level

Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.

18. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others

Your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.

19. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break

The time to take a deep breath is when you don't have time for it. If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.

20. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments

Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless, moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.

21. Stop trying to make things perfect

The real world doesn't reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done. Read "Getting Things Done" by David Allen.

22. Stop following the path of least resistance

Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don't take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.