The Tribune

By INIGO 'NAUGHTY' ZENICAZELAYA

Since Easter is approaching, and Good Friday is a holiday, I thought I’d get the jump on the ‘Easter Bunny’ with some ‘Easter Funny.’

THE TRUE MEANING OF EASTER

Several years ago, while preforming in Georgia, I had the chance to sit in on a middle school class presentation about Easter.

It’s still one of the funniest road stories I have, the comedian who I was working with, who shall remain nameless, for his sake, who is also a teacher, was asking his six-year-olds about the meaning of Easter.

“Children,” he said, “Do you know why we celebrate Easter?”

A little girl raised her hand.

“Yes Jenny,” he said.

Jenny said, “Is Easter when we put on costumes and go trick-or-treating?”

“No, Jenny. That’s Halloween. Does any one else know?”

A little boy yelled, “It’s when we set off fireworks!”

“No Jimmy, that’s Independence Day. Anybody else?”

A shy little girl in the back said, “Easter is when Jesus died.”

He replied, “That’s right, Shauna. And what happened to Jesus that makes Easter special?”

“Well, he died and got buried. And every Easter he comes out. And if he sees his shadow there’s six more weeks of winter.”

HARE SPRAY

A man was driving along the highway when he saw the Easter rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the Easter bunny jumped in front of the car and was struck by his car.

The basket of eggs and candy, the rabbit was carrying, went flying all over the place.

The driver, being a sensitive man, as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the rabbit carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colourful rabbit was dead.

The driver felt so awful, he began to cry.

A woman driving down the highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over.

She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong?

“I feel terrible”, he explained, ‘“I accidentally hit the Easter rabbit and killed it.

Children will be so disappointed. What should I do?”

The woman told the man not to worry. She knew what to do.

She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can.

She walked over to the dead, limp rabbit, and sprayed the contents of the can onto the furry animal.

Miraculously the Easter rabbit came to life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped down the road. 50 metres away the Easter rabbit stopped turned around, waved and hopped down the road. 50 metres further on, he turned again, waved and hopped another 50 metres, again he waved.

The man was astonished.

He couldn’t figure out what substance could be in the woman’s spray can. He ran over to the woman and asked, “What is in your spray can?

What did you spray on the Easter rabbit?”

The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: ‘Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave.”

Happy Easter everyone, enjoy and remember the reason for the season!