The Tribune

By FELICITY DARVILLE

WE know the bond between a mother and child can be strong. But sometimes, a child grows up under the wing of a loving grandmother, and the bond can be even stronger. That’s what happened to Meka Cooper, who was raised by her mother, Rosemary as well as her grandmother, Shirley Mae King. Meka’s life has been moulded by a caring, talented Bahamian woman and because of it, she has come into her own in a way that pays homage to the matriarch of her family.

Shirley Mae is “Mammy” to her 11 children and all of her grand and great grandchildren. Meka was often mistaken for one of Mammy’s children, and not the grandchild, as she was the youngest in the household. As a little girl, Meka would be ‘foot to foot’ behind her grandmother. She watched all of her ways. She saw her crocheting, sewing, gardening, baking and cooking. She saw Mammy was industrious and never idle; that she found time to show love and care to all her family members and to extend that virtue to the wider community. Meka had a great role model in her Mammy, who imparted the wisdom of life to her and she watched her grow.

Meka shared a special memory: “I can remember one time I went into the kitchen and saw her kneading dough for coconut tart. I was always interested in the things she did. So, being who I am, I asked her how to make the tart and, as always, she told me step by step. She showed me how to grate, boil and put in the sugar and various spices for the coconut filling. I caught on very quickly. She also taught me how to make banana bread, which I perfected. She asked me to bake this for her all the time with raisins or coconut inside. She loved her banana bread dark on top because she hated to eat it if it was light. Now, I bake and sell banana bread, pound cake and more, but I am most famous by family and friends for my amazing carrot cake.”

Growing up in a large household with extended family including her grandmother, step-grandfather, brother, aunts and uncles, Meka recalls that it was very crowded. There was a “lack of privacy, constant conflicts and different personalities to deal with”. On the other hand, “it was full of excitement and you always had a companion”. Mammy was the glue that held them all together.

Mammy had many hobbies and Meka tried to imitate her in all of them. She wasn’t able to pick up all of her skills, especially crocheting. No matter how many times Mammy showed her how to hold the needle and chord, she just couldn’t get it. Mammy even tried to show her in slow motion – nothing. But she did pick up Mammy’s knack for sewing. She got so good at it that today, Meka has a line of exquisite bags and other products that she makes by hand with fabric, straw and other materials woven into one-of-a-kind pieces.

“I have a great imagination that I have been able to successfully put to great use,” Meka says of her product line.

“My pieces boast of great craftsmanship and finished work in each product, making them look almost manufactured. They are elegant, stylish and sophisticated. To achieve this flawless look, I stitch to perfection, and I use quality hardware. The inside of each bag is lined with suede fabric. I use vibrant colours as well as neutral colour straws to set the tone for any occasion.”

She also learned how to garden from Mammy, and it’s something that kept them close even after she left the household.

“After I got married, I visited Mammy often,” said Meka.

“I would meet her either planting a flower tree or watering her garden under her room window, and I would offer to help. It was something about nature that we both enjoyed. Gardening was so therapeutic to us. A few times I would pull up some of my suckers or baby plants and take it to her for her to plant in her garden and in return, she did the same for me. Her garden was more beautiful, though. I always told her she had a green thumb, because anything she planted in her garden grew. One time, I gave her a piece of stem from my rose tree and in no time, she had a tree with blooming pink roses, which she planted in various corners of her front yard. My rose tree never bloomed, unfortunately. Up to today, I don’t know what’s happening!”

As Meka came into her own, she got a job as a cocktail server at Kerzner International, which became the Atlantis Resort. She worked there from October of 1998 to November of 2006. After resigning from the hotel, she and her husband Henry Cooper, owned and operated a small business (Destiny’s Hair & Beauty Supplies) for about two years.

As life would have it, Meka’s talents, first bestowed on her by Mammy, began to blossom and she carved out her unique talents. She was first introduced to the straw craft industry in 2009 by Tina Riley, a family friend. Fascinated by Mrs Riley’s beautiful straw products, she went home and made her first straw clutch by hand from a cereal box with a needle and thread and some straw pieces given to her by Mrs Riley. In 2010, determined to learn more, Meka took straw classes at the Bahamas Agricultural Industrial Corporation (BAIC) while she was eight months pregnant.

Over the years, Meka made straw pieces for family and friends as gifts, and also sold them. She also became a seamstress, specializing in school uniforms.

“It wasn’t until late 2018 when I fully committed myself to the straw craft that I fell in love with it,” she confesses.

“I then started a small bag business and named it “Bella Borsa” (bags of beauty). In 2019, I renamed it the ‘Shirley Mae Collection’.

Shirley Mae’s rosebuds of life closed and she took her rest after a battle with cancer. Meka could do no less than honour the woman who meant so much.

“In July of 2017, my grandmother was diagnosed with stage 3 esophageal cancer,” Meka said.

“From as long as I can remember, she always had a problem swallowing her food properly. We would always have to rush and get her some water if she did not have any on hand, because her food was hard to go down and it caused her to choke. She loved checking on and maintaining her health if there were any issues she had. This was no different.”

Shirley Mae alerted her doctors about her swallowing problem, but none suggested a biopsy, Meka said. Not until it was too late. During the biopsy, Shirley Mae’s esophagus was perforated, which complicated the matter, as fluid got into her lungs.

Meka recalls the events: “She went from feeling fine to terrible in a matter of months! By this time, she was unable to walk because of her weak limbs. She was confined to a wheelchair. She wanted to go to the United States one more time with her daughter, her traveling companion, my aunt Cynthia. She wanted to visit my mother and step father, Rosemary and George. A few days after arriving, Mammy was rushed to Memorial West Hospital because she was unable to breath properly. The doctors examined her. They told the family that in all their career, they had never seen a hole so large in anyone’s esophagus. They told her daughters that she was not going to make it back home alive; so, they encouraged her family members to come over and spend her last days with her. When I heard this news, my family and I were devastated. I was emotionally distraught! I begged my aunt Nakola, who was there with her, to please let me see “Mammy” on video call because I was not sure if I would make the trip. Thankfully, my aunt did so and I was able to see and speak with Mammy. Her voice was very weak and she could barely talk. I tried not to cry while she was watching, but I couldn’t help it. I told her that I will see her soon and I loved her. In a very low voice, she said she loved me too.”

Eventually, Meka was able to make the trip to visit her grandmother for what she assumed might be the last time. To everyone’s surprise, including the doctors, Shirley Mae got stronger and was able to fly back home.

Meka mused: “She was a fighter… to God be the glory!

After Shirley Mae returned home, Meka would visit her and just sit with her on her porch. Meka would play gospel songs on her phone and they would sing together. She cherished these precious memories because soon after, Shirley Mae’s condition worsened. She became bedridden, and her children and grandchildren became her caretakers.

“I can remember one morning, when I came over to help care for her along with a few family members… she just had a blank stare,” Meka said.

“Sheila Mae told her daughters Nakola and Patrice that she saw her sister Sylvia, who is deceased, and she was calling her.

“Excruciating pain overwhelmed her frail body. She was so strong, even in her sickness she hardly complained until the pain became unbearable. I remember her telling us that she prays we never get cancer… that she did not wish that on her worst enemy. By this time, she was ready for God to call her home. She was visited very often by Pastor Alvin Taylor, who sang songs of praise, prayed with and ministered to her.”

Meka asked her beloved grandmother to pray over her life and her business, and with a gentle squeeze of the hand, Shirley Mae let her know she had done so.

Around the second week of November 2018, Shirley Mae travelled to Andros to be with her daughters, Cynthia and Lisa. Later in the month, she had to be airlifted to Nassau on an emergency flight. On November 24, a day of thanksgiving, Shirley Mae left this realm.

“She was our hero, a warrior, one that never gave up until the end; she fought a great fight,” Meka said.

Today, Shirley Mae’s legacy lives on in all her descendants. Meka’s special Shirley Mae Collection, launched in December, 2021, allows the world to share in her legacy. The collection has reached as far as Nigeria, Europe, St Lucia, Barbados, and throughout the United States. Even a Ghanian Princess owns one of these elegant pieces. Oralee Smith, owner of Flyshine Travel Cruises, has given the bags away prizes for valued clients.

“To keep the tradition alive, the Shirley Mae Collection will continue to produce authentic Bahamian made straw products with exceptional service, in hopes that more Bahamians learn this indigenous craft.” Meka said.

She is thankful to her husband Henry Cooper, who purchased her first sewing machine and her biggest supporter, along with her children Donovan, Shaquan, Destiny and Nathan. To see the collection, visit Shirley Mae Collection on Facebook and Instagram; call 636-1508; or email shirleymaecollection@gmail.com.