The Tribune

By ALICIA WALLACE

January has almost come to an end. How are the resolutions made for 2025 coming along? Maybe there is one that has not quite been picked up in earnest yet. Maybe there is one that has fallen by the wayside. Perhaps another is feeling like realistic for the entire year. About one month in, this is a good time to, with new information, be honest about the resources available and make the necessary adjustments.

This week, I had the pleasure of catching up with a friend for the first time this year. We talked about goals, what makes them difficult to achieve, and practices we have implemented in order to increase our chances of reaching our goals.

One goal we discussed was completely outlandish. It clearly came from a place of frustration with the way things were and a desire to turn it around. In response to a lack of movement in a particular area, a goal was set to make moves that required not only a release of inhibitions, but intentionally ignoring circumstances and reasonable personal needs. When faced with the opportunity to pursue the goal, there was a complete and automatic backing away. The reason for the goal was not even considered in that moment because taking the action to achieve the goal was so clearly unnecessary and would not have been enjoyable.

It was not an experience that was needed, and it would not have even made a very good story. It would not prove anything to anyone. It became clear, soon after that moment, that goal was not quite right. It seemed like the way to go, but it was ultimately too prescriptive and had risks that would not actually pay off. It was like setting a goal to sleep for 48 hours to combat insomnia—unrealistic and not at all fit for purpose. The current situation has to be understood before a reasonable action to address it can be decided upon.

Our conversation got more exciting when we started talking about the goals we are enjoying working toward. These are the goals that not only make sense, but are standalone goals that are not connected to any fictitious versions of ourselves. They are goals that acknowledge who we are now, what we are capable of, and what we want for ourselves longterm. We agreed that we are uninterested in suffering through the achievement of goals. We want to pursue our true desires and engage in pleasant processes on our way to our goals. Goal-setting is not about punishment. It is about paving the way for action to be taken toward a particular end that can be celebrated. Though the path may not be easy, it need not be painful or continuously arduous.

Sometimes we try to do too much with a single goal. It is so big and demanding that it requires many other goals that are not recognised or articulated in the plan. It is fine to have overarching goals, but the subgoals need to be identified too.

Many people have fallen into the habit of buying more meals than they prepare at home. There rarely seems to be enough time and money to meal plan, grocery shop, and cook. In fact, most people grocery shop without meal planning, end up wasting ingredients and, by extension, money, and come to the conclusion that buying grocery does not make sense. It may be useful to have a goal that addresses this issue, but it has to be framed in a way that sets people up for success. Simply setting a goal to cook more is too vague and it skips important steps. What does “more” mean? What makes it possible to cook a certain percentage of meals or to cook a certain number of days per week? There may be a need to get out of bed earlier, to rework the weekly or monthly budget, to make a list of go-to meals, to spend less time and money at happy hour, to clean the freezer, or any number of other changes.

We have to set ourselves up for success. In this scenario, it is also important to be realistic. Going from eating every meal out to cooking every meal is extreme and leaves too much room for failure and the disappointment that is sure to follow. Gradually increasing the goal can help. Two meals per week for one month, then three meals per week in the next month, as an example, could be a more helpful, achievable goals.

Once we have SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, time-bound) goals, we can find ways to work toward them that are reasonable for our lives and the demands on our time and other resources and are also fun. With an entire year (or 11 months) to reach the goal, the road may seem long. It may get a bit bringer repetitive. It is okay to reassess our methods along the way. A monthly check-in can be helpful. By the end of February, chicken breast may be unwelcome in the new-to-meal-preparation household. It may not be that cooking is boring, but that it is time for different proteins, new spins on side dishes, and more creative combinations. It could be fun to explore recipes from a different country every month. For people who are trying to move their bodies more, walking may get a bit old. Change the route, change the pace, and maybe even make turn one of the walking days into a dance day.

One month in, the challenge is not to stick to our goals. It is to reassess and adjust them, and to work toward them in ways we can enjoy.